You had the choice between
"No contact and thus no knowledge of what the other is doing tech wise and no cost reduction in techs until we meet, but that means someone will get war happyness"
and
"Contact from the beginning, so noone gets warhappyness, but that means seeing the techs the other researches and get a reduction on techs that the other has"
You chose the first option, so that means that you 2 are not in war and that means that the one who is declaring war later in the game is gifting the other war happyness.
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Social life ? Sounds like fun !! Where can I download that ?
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