Season 36 Press Announcements
 

Well we used to do this every week but everyone got bored so i figured we could make it seasonal with the best one winning the cdz writing prize voted for by everyone else.

so heres my first offering

'Thanks to a suprising training advancement by Phillip hoff BCLG United is no longer a two man team of Florindo and Simkin, Hoff has stepped up to the plate and between the three of them command over 50% of squad total TSI.

United manager was rumoured to be in the market for a few enterprising young innermidfielders but with the view of two potential supernatural stars on the horizon he is sticking to the strike force a IV team would be pleased with.'

feel free to post as many as you want.

I just posted that the longhaired elephant is back after she was missing for two whole months.

Bit boring but heres the one I issued a couple days ago:

18/06/2008 Top Four Target
Having recovered from the shock of promotion, Pugwash FC manager DarthPugwash has set his sights on a top four finish for the clubs first season in V.

"Took us ten bloody seasons to get up here, and I sure don't intend on going back down in a hurry" commented Darth this afternoon "And I don't fancy having to play another qualifier either, so here's to a top four finish!"

6/20/2008 And with a wink and a nod....
The Meltdown has landed a seeming easy opponent in the cup. With the cup competition getting easier every round, the Meltdown can cruise into the USA Cup finals while focusing mainly on the new league schedule.

This is in contrast to last season when the Meltdown took an early round 1 exit in the cup and was able to "focus" on restructuring the team while inside a leage filled with players who played very mechanically and repetitively just like robots.

6/23/2008 Great team effort
"What a great team effort did we achieve yesterday. Never before was Lucky Aggie this strong. And this with only limited material for the VIth league.

I am proud of the guys. Of course this was a crucial match very early in the season, because we played a competitor for 6th/7th place. We will use the next games to repair the teamspirit a bit, so that we are ready for the next big match to avoid relegation."

Sadly the other manager didn't fall for my announcement. They think that I am one of the teams going for 1 to 3. I think I should be able to end 3rd or 4th though.
Aldus trainer Thomas Karlsson.

6/30/2008 The bright side of dung
With two losses under the Meltdown's belt in its new division V league, the fans are somehow still optimistic. I'm not sure what side of the crappy playing has been delightful for the punters in the stands, but they see it and continue to support the Meltdown whole-heartedly. With the top of the league coming to visit Three-mile island and a nearly insurmountable cup match, this reporter is looking for rotten tomatoes to be flying soon.

7/1/2008 A lesson 'how to play HT'

"Kabouters has the best team of this league. We got a free lesson 'how to play HT'.

With this our goal is underlined again. Avoiding relegation. For the first time in our existence we have to seriously look to avoid the bottom of the league. But we need to keep our confidence.

We are planning our near future. I will retire within two seasons, but not before I have prepared my successor for the job. A man that we still have to find."

So says Thomas Karlsson.

Bit out of date but here is one I posted last week:

Fallen Forwards
With the fight for the league title potentially coming down to goal difference, Pugwash FC have developed a problem - both of their first-choice strikers will be unavailable for the final game of the season against Unobrow FC!

Our reporter attempted to question Pugwash FC's manager about this at the club's training ground earlier today, and while we cannot repeat his answer in full, we can tell you that a large portion of it rhymed with "clucking bell!"

I made a press announcement of the 5th celebration of Shabba FC's birthday. Yes, I've been playing this game for 5 years now...

That's 16 1/4 seasons... your old